Generally speaking, do you think that most people are doing the best they can?

A resounding yes.

YES.

I believe that most people are doing the best they can.

I have a hard time believing that anyone gets up in the morning thinking "today is a great day to be a mediocre girlfriend."

No one sets out with the intention of being (for example) a crappy parent.

Or decides that the way to go is to be a second rate friend.

I don't think anyone begins by feeling it would be OK to make an inferior effort.

It is no one's goal to be indistinguishable.

Life is tough. Patience runs out. We have difficult days, exasperated days. We take wrong turns. We make mistakes and bad decisions.

We very often - I very often - do a shoddy job.

On that day, a shoddy job was the best I could manage.

Here is what is most salient: My life improves dramatically when I begin by giving the other person this benefit of the doubt.

Instead of feeling insulted, hurt or wronged by whoever did not meet my (often unvoiced) expectations, I tell myself they were doing the best they can.

This changes my outlook: from feeling disappointed to feeling compassion.

More often than not, it turns out to be true.

Believing that people are doing the best they can is a better way to go through life.

Read other answers by

Dushka Zapata on Quora:

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