Children are curious beasts.
So now my 4 year old son Elijah has started school, I get to have interesting bus conversations with him, such as:
"How big is Earth?"
"How many roads are there?"
With the help of Google I have answered or at least estimated enough to satisfy his little mind.
An obvious conversation I had a few months ago was about the zombie apocalypse (which is apparently due around Halloween, how convenient).
The questions were relentless, so this version is abridged:
"Daddy, it's nearly Halloween. Will there be ghosts and zombies?"
"There's no such thing as ghosts and there's no zombies around here, but if you want to use your imagination they can be real. You can do anything with your imagination."
"Okay, but there might be some zombies soon?"
"It's unlikely, but we'll have to keep an eye out for them."
"Why are there zombies?"
"Zombies happened when scientists made a virus and it infected some people."
"So... What do zombies eat?"
"They like to eat people. You like sweeties don't you?"
"Yes."
"Well people are like sweeties to zombies. Their favourite bit is the brains."
"Not my brain, it's too small! How can we stop them eating brains?"
"We have to chop off their head or maybe in a fire."
"How can we chop off their head?"
"With a sword, a knife or a big stick."
"Can I poke the zombies eye out? Would that kill it?"
"No, that would just make it even angrier."
"Could we use a pizza cutter?"
"No because it's not sharp enough and they might bite you."
"Can I poke the zombies eye out? Would that kill it?"
"No, that would just make it even angrier."
"What happens when they bite you?"
"You turn into a zombie and get really angry. Zombies are always angry."
"Can cats be zombies?"
"Yep any animals can be zombies. Sometimes I think Elsker is a zombie cat, she loves to bite me. We'll have to keep a close eye on her."
"If I put a person's brain in a zombie, would they become normal again?"
"No it doesn't work like that. Scientists are trying to work on a way to stop the zombie virus."
"Do zombies drink blood? Could I put some blood in a zombie to turn them back into a person?"
"Zombie blood is very angry, it will just eat the normal blood."
"At night time, will the zombies come into my bedroom?"
"No, they can't get past the door."
"Can't they break the door down?"
"No their arms would fall off."
"Are zombies sticky like slugs?"
"Not really, no."
"If there is a nice zombie, could it be my friend?"
"No, zombies are always very angry, they just want to eat your brains. They're very stupid."
"So if crisps were people flavoured, would zombies eat them?"
"Who would make people flavoured crisps?"
"The naughty men."
"Oh. Where would the people come from?"
"The people factory."
"No, people crisps wouldn't be fresh enough, they like living people the best."
"Are zombies red?"
"No they're grey because zombies are undead."
"Okay."
And that was the end of that. We're now both on a high zombie alert.
Read other answers by Dan Knight on Quora:
- What is the most gorgeous thing that you have heard a child say?
- What is the most embarrassing thing your child has done in a supermarket?
- What are some of the best questions/answers asked/given by kids?
from Quora http://ift.tt/2k5LIgX
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