Wednesday, August 31, 2016

Did you ever own a pet or cared for a rescued animal, bird, fish or beast of any kind that left you wondering why anybody would enjoy ownership?

Oh, dear god yes. As rehabbers, we got in a lot of Barn Owls. Now, owls as a whole are as dumb as a slab of linoleum, and yet often can be pleasant enough to care for, and make you feel rewarded when you release them. Barred Owls in particular were delightful. But not Barn Owls.

Barn Owls, at least the ones we’ve encountered in North America (and other North American rehabbers have told me the same) are utterly hateful, spiteful, creatures made of 100 pounds of malignant hatred stuffed in a 10 oz. body. They hate each other. They hate you. They hate being hungry. They hate not being hungry. They make the threat posture and hiss at you every second you are in their sight. If you have to force-feed them, they flip on their back and turn into a porcupine of talons.

And yet, there are people out there (not in the US; it’s illegal to have pet Barn Owls in the US) who have Barn Owls as pets. I have no explanation for this that does not involve mind altering substances.



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