Saturday, February 4, 2017

What would you do if bacon became illegal?

You’d walk to the corner of one of the “ghettos” of the city. This suspicious looking man in a grey hoodie with his hood on is standing in the corner with hands in his pockets. He’ll be like “Pssst, you want some of this salted porkbelly, dude?”

Just like cocaine is called crack, marijuana is called weed, there will also be a slang word for bacon. Since I can't think of what to call it, I'm just gonna it “"salted porkbelly.”

He opens up his unzipped hoodie, showing a Ziploc clear plastic bag of bacon (probably grounded up and made into clustered chunks). He’ll probably charge you 50 dollars a bag, which we all know it's overpriced but it's illegal and rare now. The TV goes wild as you hear the news reported say:

“42 yr old man overdosed on 20 ounces of bacon.”

“Police find stash of bacon hidden under man’s floorboards.”

“Drug cartel caught with $2 Million worth of bacon by Coast Guard.”

Personally, I would love to hear a cop yell out “We’re here to confiscate the bacon!” It would be completely weird and hilarious.



Read other answers by Andrew Nguyen on Quora: Read more answers on Quora.

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